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Kiunisala - Barzaga

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Our Marriage Preparation Program
 
D I S C O V E R Y   W E E K E N D
 
 

DW session (we're in leftmost front 2nd row)
We weighed our finances & schedule couple of times before we finally decided to attend the Discovery weekend program. Aside from its fee of P4800/couple, which was rather expensive on our part as we are also paying numerous wedding suppliers, the DW has its disclaimer that not all couples who attended the said program end up in the altar. Although as the program described it, it cannot lead to a wrong step. If the partners decide to break up after taking the program, they still come out as winners for they would have a better knowledge of themselves and the kind of partners they are looking for. They would be better prepared for their next serious relationship. Whatever each couple has decided on its relationship after the program, is always right for themselves, their relationship and their future plans.
 
As for us, instead of backing out, we took everything as a challenge though we would earlier tease each other after all the wedding preparations that whatever happens, the wedding will push thru.. or whoever backs out, the one who'd be left gets everything in the joint savings account. Well, we would also admit that we prefer the single weekend of DW instead of the 3-sundays pre-cana seminar our church requires.
 

actual dialogue (taken by DW admin)

We are happy with the realizations and the dialogues. We are able to sit down and talk with all our honesty our inner selves, childhood experiences relating to who we are at present, to how our relationship started, how the arguments came about and how to better resolve them, to simple issues such as after the marriage which side would we spend the holidays with, to greater possible financial, emotional & spiritual pre-marital problems.  All our fears, insecurities & weaknesses are discussed but only with each other allowing you to find ways to continually grow and become a better person in the relationship despite them. All in all, the experience is incredibly unexplainable and we just really feel we love each more. We highly recommend for other couples, although possibly stil not considering the marriage but are serious enough with each other, to likewise attend it. It is indeed a very fruitful and an eye-opener experience.
 
And while we still have this very warm feeling inside, fresh from having attended the program (obvious ba?), let us share 2 questions with our answers pertaining to the other during the actual DW sessions (and this proves men have always lesser and more general things to say).

1. In what ways have you helped me grow as a person?

KEN: There have been a lot that I feel you contributed to my growth as a person. Primarily, they are your confidence and all-out support in me believing in everything I do and plan to do as long as you feel it would be beneficial to me, and possibly to also our relationship. It is you who always tell me that, in a summary, I can always achieve my goals in life if I put my mind and heart on pursuing them. You have always believed in me even if sometimes I would find myself already doubtful. I feel that my current status in my career and as a son, brother, friend and partner, are mostly because of your help and support. Secondly, I am who I am right now because of the ways you have showed me you love me. You have always been there most esp in my down times. You constantly advise me, cheer me up, and give me comfort and strength to face my problems. I know there are just too many but I feel these are the top 2.

TRINA: From the start, you have always been so supportive of whatever I would want to do. Pursuing my graduate studies came in less than a year after we became officially together. You knew my schooling would mean less frequent times together given our very busy schedule at work. You even waited for my exam, which was held in far north, to finish just to pick me up and bring me home to Cavite. My graduate school also entailed cost and with me supporting for my own schooling, you did your share by footing for our dates, driving me around back & forth from school, and all your little ways of helping me out to lessen the pressure that work-school life was giving me esp the term when I had saturday classes. If i liked anything but can't afford with the enrollment nearing, you'd surprisingly buy it for me. Then came the job offer to work for our current employer, we dialogued about it so many times with you just waiting for your promotion and not wanting to adjust not being together in the workplace. You initially opted to stay with our previous employer and yet you didn't hinder my decision to advance. These are just but some of which you have actually sacrificed for me to reach out with my goals in life. And today, here you are seriously participating in all these activities and even scolding me for making fun at times. In fact, this DW was out of our wedding budget but you even went out of your way to deposit the payment. Maybe, I don't say this as often but I've always been thankful for everything that you're doing for me. I really am very happy having you here with me tonight and realizing together how much we've contributed for the betterment of each other and our relationship.
 
2. What are my reasons for wanting to marry you?

KEN: I have uncountable reasons for wanting so but, with all my heart, my primary reason is because I really really really love you. You are definitely the person whom I want to grow old with and be with everyday of our live.. You are that person I am very comfortable being with, talking about just anything... You are the one I want to share my life with.. my ups, downs.. for richer or poorer, in sickness & health.. You are the one!  Another reason that I can come up with is that God has plan for me... and you are the integral part of that plan. I believe God really wants us to be together. He gave me you as a gift to complete myself. And I thank God for all these.. and I thank God, above all, for creating you into this world.

TRINA: Getting married used to be my least priority and everybody just don't think I was the marrying type. 25 years old is still a very young age to lose your identity as an individual esp when you still haven't reached the minimum of your career goals or at the least just enjoy your being single buying for yourself and your family with your own hard-earned money. During the early stage of the relationship, you already asked me if I could possibly see the relationship as something long-lasting. I was hesitant to let you know my true answer after having explained to me yours. But as days turn to months and months to years, you have proven to me you really are the ONE... the one i'd love to be with for a long time.. and now, for a lifetime. I jusr really feel you will be a good husband and a father to our future kids.. your whole package--that boy-next-door personality, your being responsible son, brother, friend & boyfriend, your being smart, honest, hardworking, funny, family oriented and God fearing, and probably your everything, just contributes to my visualization of a good future together. I love you and I love having you around. I love the feeling you making me laugh, giving me advices, being cuddled by you, talking even in silence.. I just love everything about you. All in all, it lies to that jollibee motto, "YOU COMPLETE ME."
 

we're really meant!

As we all know, there are couples that do get married just for the sake of companionship, or maybe not wanting the feeling getting old alone (who would want to, anyway?). We can't further explain how thanful we are that we aren't one of them and that weekend proved doubly to that. After that meaningful weekend, we now truly believe we are rightfully made for each other (yes, the looooong wait is really worth it), we really are in loved, and we feel more secure about being together for a lifetime. :)
 
 
 

If interested, contact details are
DISCOVERY WEEKEND
FOUNDATION
 
SPIRITUAL-PASTORAL CENTER
Office: 3/F Center for Family Ministries (CEFAM)
Ateneo De Manila, Loyola Heights, QC
Contact Person: Lala Denila
Telefax: 426-1271
Mobile:  09176656181
website:
http://www.discoveryweekend.org/
E-mail:  info@discoveryweekend.org

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two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one.